Warning, ladies: Rain can make you fat!

Fat woman in the rainThis afternoon I received this press release. I particularly enjoy the way the bit about the bikini body is in bold. Are you taking the bikini body countdown seriously, ladies, ARE YOU?

Don’t Let the Washout Ruin Your Waistline

This less than fabulous May weather has left us all with an unusual dilemma: with just a couple of months to get a bikini body it should be time to enjoy lovely crisp salads and ice cold water out in the sunshine but as the wind whistles and the rain lashes all we want to do is curl up under the duvet and gorge on stodgy winter warmers. Rather than springing into Summer it’s starting to look like we might all be dragging ourselves and our hibernation bellies kicking and screaming into the sunshine.

Well, gosh, now that you mention it, it is an unusual dilemma. You know, in the sense that I have never thought about it before in my life. But good point. I mean, God forbid I go out in public with my hibernation belly on display [is this even a thing?]. But what am I to do? Under normal circumstances I fucking love eating leaves and drinking tap water but the rainy weather just makes me want to stuff my face with deep-fried carbs. Oh what an endless cycle of failure and self-loathing my life is… but I digress.

Luckily for hibernating ladies all over this grey and unpleasant land, Tefal has the answer.

Praise be. The world shall not have my flabby gut inflicted on it after all.

Tefal ActiFry uses a unique heat pulse technology to cook food using just one spoonful of oil meaning you can whip up a healthy stew, chilli con carne or even popcorn and indulge without worrying about your waistline. 

First of all, most recipes only call for a tablespoon of oil anyway and you can cook all these things in a pan so I’m not entirely sure what the point of this product is. Secondly, all this talk of food has reminded me that it now costs about £1.30 for a courgette which means the chances of me getting anywhere near a beach this summer are severely limited anyway. Thirdly… wait, what was my third point again? Oh yes, fuck off.



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